Still developing my posts “on the horrendous deaths of leaders gleefully described by the historians and chroniclers who hated them,” I bring you the grizzly tale of the Byzantine Emperor Nikephoros I. You can see him here in this painting — not the one with the crown on the left, though. Rather, Nikephoros — or rather, his skull– is the drinking cup on the right after the person on the left had his way with him.
Nikephoros made many enemies during his rule, including the the clergy in his realm, whom he taxed more than they were used to. Those folks ended up being the writers that recorded the Emperor’s deeds, and they definitely highlighted his shortcomings. For instance, when discussing Nikephoros’ treatment of his Bulgarian neighbors, the Syrian Patriarch Michael wrote that Nikephoros:.
“walked into the Bulgarians’ land, and killed great numbers of them. He reached their capital, seized it and devastated it. His savagery went to the point that he ordered to bring their small children, got them tied down on earth and made thresh grain stones to smash them.”.
So in 811, the Bulgarian leader Khan Krum (who has the best name ever, btw) raised an army and defeated Nikephoros’ armies, and the Emperor was killed. It was clergy who described that the Khan had Nikephoros’ skull turned into a drinking cup. He could taste revenge with each meal, and the historians who recorded the deed have allowed readers across the centuries to participate in his posthumous humiliation.
